Stewardship of Pain

It is a particularly painful time in my life as I write this. Not pain of a physical or physiologic nature, but rather pain of a psychic or life choices nature. The Buddha stated that all life is suffering - one of the four Noble Truths. I have not found that to be true in my own life, but I have suffered some and am suffering now. Certainly, my time as an ICU practitioner brought me into daily contact with the realities of suffering for critically ill and injured persons and their families. I have witnessed countless thousands die, and countless others who through the "miracle" of technology left the ICU to exist neither living nor dying in residential facilities across the U.S. Sometimes in this life there are things out of one's control that cause suffering. All of that suffering which was out of my control has wounded me...but it has also blessed me. How is that?! My favorite preacher is Frederick Buechner whose best sermons have been collected in a work entitled, "Secrets in the Dark: A Life in Sermons". I highly recommend it as a wonderful look into a truly gifted man and his attempt at making sense out of life. One of his sermons called out to me today as I contemplated my current situation. It is entitled, "Adolescence and the Stewardship of Pain". A seemingly obtuse title linking becoming an adult, with being responsible for something, and pain - something we all try very hard to avoid. Reverend Buechner does a marvelous job of weaving his story with that of the parable of the five talents and the lifelong learning that we are called to. Life teaches us, if we not only have our eyes and ears open, but the courage to accept the lessons that are presented. One of those "teachable moments" is that it is difficult to be fully responsible for our pain and by being fully responsible, to live into it and through it and come out the other side transformed. It is easier to bury painful lessons, at least for a while. Those of us who have lived a bit understand that sooner or later those painful lessons emerge. Becoming a good steward of our pain, both personal and collective, is what a spiritual life seems to be all about. Being able to share with one another both good and bad, and to seek wisdom from those events, seems to be the point of all major religions. We are not created to be alone, nor are we created to suffer alone - we need right relationships to help us move through our adolescence. Like the parable of the five talents, we are good and faithful servants when we invest what we are given - even when that investment is fraught with peril and fear. Having the ability to invest my pain instead of holding on to it is a life lesson that is proving invaluable to me right now. What a blessing! This week, find someone to share your pain with - or someone who needs to share their pain. If you don't know how to do the latter, investigate programs like Stephen Ministry, spiritual guidance or pastoral counseling. Learn how to be in right relationship with another. Be a good and faithful steward of the whole of your life. In this way you will be blessed and a blessing. Peace for the journey, Dan